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Okay. Here it is. Home again. For the first time... since....

I ring the doorbell. Was that odd? Don't I live here? I mean, I don't, but - it's my parents' house. It was my house until I left last month. I should just walk in. Shouldn't I? Can't I?...

I take hold of the doorknob, and immediately get nervous. I turn it anyway, after all it's just my parents.

As the door starts to open I feel it being pulled. I look up from the knob to see my father opening the door from the other side. We both stop and just look at each other. I'm not sure how long he regards me, but I see warmth in his eyes. Joy. And a touch of surprise, or maybe sorrow?

"Dad- dy?" I almost whisper.

He opens the door wide and pulls me into a tight hug, which I gladly return. "Call more often," is all he says.

"I promise."

As he slowly lets me go I begin to see my mother. She's standing in the doorway to the Dining Room, looking... unsure? She doesn't appear to be happy to see me. She doesn't appear to be unhappy either though. Dad keeps an arm around my shoulders as he turns to face Mom alongside me.

"Hi Mom," I say.

"Alesha," she responds. She takes one measured step forward. "Or should I call you Troia too?"

I sigh and look down. "Mooom," I protest with the standard teenage whine.

"Well I had to make sure. You know, a daughter springs a super-hero living inside of her to her parents, then immediately leaves home. She doesn't call or write for a month, doesn't visit for two. What is a mother supposed to think?"

I look to my Dad, I'm home only a minute and I'm already annoyed with Mom. Actually, it's nice to know we fall back into our roles so easily. I sigh, exhaling to let out the frustration. Then I let go of Dad and walk to Mom. As I give her a hug I say "You're right. I'm sorry. I've missed you."

She puts her arms around me, but it feels tentative, light, hesitant. As if she's worried she might break me. I lean back. "Is something wrong?" I ask.

"No, no." She smiles, but it looks off.

"Okay..." I let that lie slide, for now. "So, what's for dinner?"

--------Time Lapse--------

"How's school going?" Mom asks as she sits down from serving dinner.

"Fine," I reply. Before she can go into her standard reaction to my normally shutting her out, I continue. "I've registered at one of the Universities in California. Only half of my credits transferred, but as a Freshman that doesn't hurt much. I've already declared my major in Medicine, and will be allowed to start taking relevant classes next semester."

Mom looks stunned to silence.

Dad nods approvingly.

I smile. "How's work going for you?" I ask, actually wanting to hear the answer.

--------Time Lapse--------

The phone rings while Dad and I are playing chess. Mom answers it. Sounds like it was for her, so I don't even look up. It's mine turn to move anyways.

A few minutes later my ears perk to Mom's tone. "It was almost criminal!" she's saying to her friend. And suddenly she's off on a judgmental rant, which somehow within minutes leads to how new age "non-religions" are leading the world's youth astray.

I feel Dad's hand on my arm. I look back from Mom to him, and realize I'm scowling. He shakes his head.

"Let it go, Allie."

I think to protest, but decide he's right. "Alright. This time."

But then Mom dives into how the wide spread acceptance and support of single parents - other than widows of course - is deplorable and has caused

"What Mother?" I demand to know. I can't stand it anymore. I get up from my chair to face her. "Caused what? More children to have a loving home, instead of no parents at all? Mothers to not be ashamed and have to give up their child? More children to grow up in an non-abusive environment?"

Mom only looks shocked for a second. She smiles as she turns away from me to say sweetly into the phone "Let me call you back later. My daughter is home, I'd like to spend some time with her."

I can hear the person on the other end of the line say, "Oh, of course! That's so nice, your daughter visits you. Tell her Hi for me."

I cross my arms as Mom and her friend exchange goodbye pleasantries. I know what's coming. She's not in a good mood, she'd really good at putting on fake acts. Dad knows too. Without a word he carefully picks up the chess board and heads out of the room.

Sure enough, as soon as she puts down the phone her entire demeanor changes. She turns on me angrily. "How dare you interrupt me like that!"

"I can't believe you!" I retort with. "How can you even say such things?! How can you be so narrow minded?! I can't believe my own Mother thinks -"

"I'M narrowminded? I'm not the one who believes -"

"You have NO idea what I believe! If you can't even understand..."


Home Again

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It seems I can't talk with my mother anymore. Even a simple hello turns into a fight. We fight a majority of the time I'm home. Religion. Politics. Values. Treatment of people, respect.

This is the second time I've been home since joining the Titans. And this visit was almost an exact repeat of my first between my mother and I. Dad tried to mediate a couple of the fights, but I think he knows there's really not much he can do. We're both strong willful women, who happen to have nearly opposing opinions. It's a recipe for disaster.

And yet, when it comes time for me to leave, she cries. I guess I really don't understand her. No, in this case I do understand. She's my Mom. She raised me, taught me, cared for me. No matter what I do, where I do I'm her little girl. We may not like each other much, but we do love each other.

Maybe if we only deal with each other in small doses.... I think I'll try that next time I'm home.


Thanksgiving (Canada)

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Things are going pretty well this visit. We've only had one fight, it was about freedom of speech. Mom and I even made it through a movie together. I see her watching me a lot, but she doesn't say much. It feels like she's intentionally trying to avoid fighting. I am too. Besides it being Thanksgiving tomorrow, I'm tired of fighting with her. I'm sure Dad's tired of hearing it!

I'm looking through picture albums now. It's nice reminiscing, though all this is starting to seem like a distant life now. Summer trips, holidays. My baby book! Oh look at these pictures. So cute! And all about me at birth, when I first sat up, stood, walked. My first word was family... well, fa-ly! But it says here I used it correctly.

What's this? A new album. It's a book of newspaper clippings and... written down news broadcasts... of me! Wait, oh my.... This is EVERYthing I've done since I left home. Geez! How did they get clippings from the States? Wow.

"Your mother puts a lot of effort into that," I hear my Dad's voice say.

I look up at him. "Mom did this?" I would have guessed Dad did.

He comes and sits down next to me. "We're proud of you honey. You're handling it all really well."

I lean against his shoulder as we start to go through the albums together. But the thought creeps into my head, 'Me? Or...'

Mom comes in and sits down next to Dad. She takes the album of news on Troia out of my hands. "You've been doing some good things," she states like a dry fact.

I look at Dad briefly. "Thank you," I reply to her, leaving out the words 'I think'.

"But you should be more careful," she adds.

I nod. "I know Mom. It's a dangerous business. But we look out for each other," I try to ease her motherly fears. At least I didn't say 'I know what I'm doing'. Those words always lead to a fight.

"I mean, you could have handled some of these better."

"Huh?" What is THAT supposed to mean?

"Anita," my Dad says to Mom to try and get her to change the subject.

She looks at me. "I'm just saying that you need to learn more before you try and undertake some stunts like you have. You've been sloppy. And lucky things have gone your way in the end, they just as easily could have gone badly."

I think she keeps talking, but I'm not hearing anything anymore. I'm totally stunned. Lucky? Okay, sure. But... Sloppy? Stunts? What...? How...? I can't even wrap my mind around this.

I stand up. I so don't need this. My own mother? I already worry about the people we go to help and my teammates. I know I don't know enough yet, I've only just gotten my own powers under control. I'm still struggling with the balance of Donna and I. If I do the slightest thing wrong out in the field... so much could go bad.

I'm in my room now, but I don't remember how I got here. I hear my Dad calling my name. I don't want to talk to him. I close the door and reach for the phone.

"Please be home Liz. Please."

--------Time Lapse--------

Mom and I are back to fighting regularly. Only a day and a half and I'm already sick of it. It's time to try the small doses theory. Right after dinner.

I bound down from my room to the dining room. There's no one here, so I head to the kitchen, and am just in time to hear Mom say, "That's not my daughter."

I stop in my tracks.

"Anita," Dad admonishes in a quiet voice. They are both speaking softly.

"No, Herald. I know my daughter. I know her hopes and dreams. I know how she walks and talks. I know why she is who she is... was. I know how to deal with my daughter. That woman - I can't deal with her. I-"

"Don't worry, Anita," I say, pointedly using her first name. Dad and my former mother both looked very surprised. "You won't ever have to deal with me again."

"Allie!" Dad exclaims. "Allie wait. You don't-"

I run off to my room. I can't stay here anymore. I'll just go back to the Tower early. Pack all my things, quickly as possible. I can visit Dad other places, there'll be other times. I'll call Liz on the way.

I stop on my way out to hug my Dad and tell him I love him. He tries to hold on to me, and says I misunderstood. Oh yeah? How do you misunderstand 'That's not my daughter?' I look around. Mom's no where to be seen. "No I didn't," I inform him. "I'll call soon." And with that I leave.

--------Time Lapse--------

My anger lasted me to the border. I managed to hold it together to get across into the States, thankfully no one make a big deal of me flying across. The customs officers waved, so I'm sure there wasn't a problem. But then the tears started. Now I'm in Seattle and I just can't keep it in anymore. I don't think I can make it... to my home.

I find a place to land and duck out of sight for a bit. Change into street clothes, and put on my "Allie" wig and glasses. Work my way into the public, then hail a cab and have it take me to the airport. I bit my lip the whole way to keep from crying outloud. The driver asks me a couple times if I'm okay. "No, just, take me to the airport please. I have to get home," is all I respond.

The driver finally nods and leaves me alone until we get there, where I am then told the ride was no charge and to have the best of luck in getting home. I try to manage a smile, and thank the driver profusely, but quickly. Now that I'm here, I wipe my eyes so I can see where I need to go. After a few minutes I manage to find the correct check-in location.

When I finally get to a machine I scan my passport. The screen welcomes me by name, Alesha Morse, but then blinks and says my ticket has been cancelled. What!? How can it be cancelled? I frown, and call over an attendent. "This thing says my ticket has been cancelled?"

The woman takes my passport and looks up the problem. She nods at the screen. "Yes Miss." She gives me an odd look. "It says here you did not check-in for the first leg of your trip?"

I nod. "I was, ah, down here in the area, and figured why go back up to Canada just to fly back down here?"

The woman hands me back my passport and explains the situation with a no-nonsense, and maybe slightly annoyed, tone. "You were not on the first flight, and so all remaining legs of the trip were cancelled. Airline policy."

My jaw drops. It's a few seconds before my mind finishes processing what she's said, by which time she is walking away. "Wait...," she turns, sort of, "So...", I flounder for the right words, "what am I supposed to do?"

She shrugs. "You could buy a new ticket," she points towards the ticketing area, "or you could use the same method for how you got here to get whereever you are going." And with that she walks away.

Slowly I pick up my bag and move aside so the next person can use the machine. But I'm still slightly in shock. What AM I supposed to do now?

Well, I'm not feeling so upset anymore, maybe I could fly the rest of the way. I head out of the airport and find a hidden place to change back to Troia. But as I pull my uniform out, it's a blatent reminder of why Mom- Anita said what she said. Why she feels the way she feels...

And now I'm crying again.


Return Home

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I try to think of what to do, but I can't think of anything but those words. I hear them over and over. Now I'm crying so much it's getting hard to breath. I need help....

As I finish donning my uniform my fingers run over my Titan communicator. That works. I call the first person that comes to my mind.

"Impulse here," I hear Wind in the background.

"It- it's- Tro- ia," I manage to get out between sharp inhales of crying, "I- need- please- come- get- me?"

"Troia! Where are ya Girl I can be there in seconds! Whats wrong?" he asks.

"See-at-le..." I take a deep breath. "The airport. I can't - get my flight - I didn't - take the first flight to here - and - now - they won't let me take the second half - rules." Another deep breath. "I just want to go home."

By the time I finish he is here, in costume, of course. He has a look of concern on his face. My face must look awful by now. I don't care. I take hold of him, hug him, and can't seem to let go of him.

He doesn't move for a moment, but then hugs me back. "Why not just fly yourself Troia? You ok?"

I shake my head no. "My... I'm - too upset. I can't - see well enough. Just want to go home."

"What has you so upset? Something Happen? I can take ya home. Just tell me where to go." He lifts me up in his arms, testing at first to be sure I let him, which I do.

I pause for a moment trying to collect my toughts. How do I answer that? Tell him where to go? "The tower... s my - only home," I tell him, "now," I append.

He looks confused for a moment. "Ok here we go..., we will be there before you know it." He begins his run to the tower. He doesn't seem to be going all out, but definately fast enough for my tastes.

Soon I start to get tired. I'm all cried out for now. Huh, odd, Kyle's heart isn't racing... I would have... thought... other... wise...

--------Time Lapse--------

Okay, I feel asleep. Feels like my bed at the tower. Open my eyes to confirm, yup it's my room. Will have to thank Kyle later. For now, I don't really want to get up. I curl up and pull the covers tighter around me.

Tears start flowing again, but I don't have the strength to cry outright. Slight tears for slight pain. Donna hurts too. Mothers are so important. She would know more than most. Amazons reguard the bond between Mother and child as sacred. I do to. I think I always did.

Eventually, I don't know how long, my nose gets the better of me. Sniffling isn't working for me anymore, I need a tissue. I pull myself slowly to sitting up and look around. Do I even have any tissues in here?

Woah! Someone else is here! Oh, it's Kyle... just sitting there looking at me. I look down at myself in my bed. Has he been here the whole time? My nose reminds me of my original purpose. I seek out a tissue, blow my nose, then turn to Kyle. "Thank you."

He shrugs. "Anytime. You ok?"

I sigh. "No."

"Do you want to be alone?" He stands up.

"No!" I answer, probably too desperately. I reach towards him. "Please, no."

He grins and sits back down. "What happend?"

"My Mother..." I slump back. "She... she..."

"If you don't want to talk about its ok."

I purse my lips slightly and shake my head, but not at Kyle. I can't seem to figure out how to get the words out. Kyle just sits, waiting so patiently. After a bit I start talking, maybe just saying something, anything, will help. "I don't know what to do. I didn't do anything. Well, no, I did, but I didn't mean it wrong. I was just saying what I believe, why I felt she was wrong.... I guess we just fought too much.... Maybe? Or maybe she really doesn't love me, know me..." I look up towards the cieling. "I know I'm not who I was. I know things have changed. Changed lots."

"She is not dealing well with her daughter being a super hero huh," Kyle asks more like a statement.

I look at him. Then look down again. "She disowned me," I confess. My voice gets quieter, weaker. "She said... I'm not her daughter."

"What!" He moves over and sits beside me on the bed. "Why would she do that."

I look at him for a bit. Should I tell him? Should I not? Does it matter anymore? Come on, just make a decision.

"I... am not just... the girl I was last year." I take a deep breath. "Troia, the original one, she's inside of me. Her spirit, or something, I'm not really sure. But it's her. That's why I have her powers." I shrug slightly. "And some of her memories."

Kyle arches his eyebrow. "Ok. So your saying that the Troia that was on the origianal Titans with my dad is inside you?" He shrugs. "Stranger thangs have happened I guess. Still dosen't tell me why she disowned you. I know its none of my business though."

I exhale a long breath. He took it well. First person to do so. No, second. Liz was the first.

"They sort of merged," I explain. "Troia and who I was before, I guess is the best way to put it, making me. Sometimes I wonder if what I believe is Troia or the other girl? Sometimes I think they believed the same things, but that girl I was used to be too bogged down in high school mentality and material things. Maybe Troia simply made her grow up. I don't really know." I chuckle dryly. "Sometimes I don't really know who I am."

"Hmm... I would say I can relate but... well I really can't." He grins and shrugs. "If it helps I could always ask my Dad the next time he visits from the Speed Force to come talk to you. Maybe it will help."

My first react to the offer is panic. I don't need another former team member flipping out on me right now. "Ah... maybe not yet." I put my hand on Kyle's and smile. "Thank you for the offer, but so far everyone who knew Troia hasn't taken well to me when they first find out I exist. And well, I'm not really telling anyone about Troia yet." I give a small gesture with my eyes and head. "Other than Wonder Woman and Vic, who I had to tell before they blasted me for impersonating her, oh and Superman who showed up with Wonder Woman, you're the only one I've told." After a second I add, "Besides my parents of course... when it first happened I was so confused..."

Kyle nods. "Got it." He makes the Zipping his lip motion.

"Thanks," I smile at him again as best I can.

"No Problem. I'm here if you need me."

I choke back some tears. "Thank you," I say quietly.

He pulls me in for a hug. I hug him back.